The Wine Knows

In his latest Seattle Times column, Paul Gregutt responds to readers who wrote in after a recent piece on corks vs. screwcaps. Right up front, he addresses the question of whether he thinks not using corks hurts the environment.

You see, there's this story going around that if the cork industry fails, the folks who grow cork trees in Portugal will need to cut them down and sell the land to people who will turn them into housing developments. As the story goes, it will cause the loss of habitat for animals.

This, Gregutt writes, doesn't pass the sniff test. He's absolutely right.

For decades, the cork industry has ignored the pleas of winemakers who need better quality. Mention cork problems to just about any winemaker and you'll hear grumbling, mumbling and swearing.

But now that wineries are turning to alternatives en masse, the cork industry has a problem. It turns out that many of the customers it was counting on to reject screwcaps simply don't care about anything but the quality in the bottle. For the longest time, that was its ace in the hole.

Whoops.

I am certain that someone somewhere believes this apocalyptic view of the cork forests being turned into condos and some poor wolf losing its home. And the cork industry's PR machine has glommed onto it as a way to play to our base instincts with the hopes of bailing itself out of this mess.

Where I fear this will take root is Oregon, whose wine industry is more sensitive to the environment than just about anywhere. In Oregon, we have organic wines, sustainable vineyards, salmon-safe wines, etc. I am not making fun of this because it's all very important, as is the future of family farming.

But to tell Oregon winemakers they might someday hurt an animal in Portugal if they use screwcaps is playing a sympathy card. And it has to be very, very confusing to a state known for giving trees big hugs, a state whose official religion is recycling.

Let's stop this right now. The cork industry can fix its problems with TCA-tainted wines by putting money, research and effort into it. In the past five years, it has made some progress because it has recognized that people are tired of good wines turned bad by poor corks. It has actually admitted there's a problem. But instead of fixing the problem, it is using this PR baloney to try to sway people's feelings.

The cork industry is kind of like Microsoft's operating systems: It works really well 90-95% of the time. The problems come in that last window (so to speak), which is filled with all kinds of issues. The big difference is Microsoft actually works hard to fix those problems, while the cork industry tries to cover them up with smoke and mirrors.

I love to pull the cork out of a bottle. I love the sound it makes. And I am relieved if the wine doesn't smell like a wet dog sleeping on rotting cardboard. When the cork industry comes clean - in its practices as well as its public relations - I will renounce my need for screwcaps, glass stoppers and all other alternatives.

That day could not come soon enough.